Tag Archives: sex

Too Much Kinkiness

Knightley

So I work with this girl. And she’s super nice and funny and gorgeous. We’ve gone out for drinks and stuff before. The other night we went to her place afterward and it got a little steamy. But then she pulls out this weird riding crop thing with feathers on it and asked me to “beg for it”. I went along with it but I’m not gonna lie, it made me uncomfortable. Last night I went over and she had left a trail of rose petals throughout her apartment and then I found her (details removed) and that was a bit too much. HELP!!!

-Rose Petals DO NOT belong there

Image

Dear Petals,

A wise man once said “Don’t Diss It Till You’ve Tried It”. If you have already tried whatever she was doing with the rose petals and you didn’t like it, tell her to back off and go easy. But try it first, you never know, you might actually like it.

Sincerely,

Mr Knightley


Revenge Sex

Dear Mr Knightley
My boyfriend cheated on me. And so now I want to get revenge. I want to cheat on him too. But my friend Angela said I shouldn’t because it will just backfire. I think I’m gonna do it. But what do you think.
Thanks,

A Dish Best Served Cold

RevengeSex copy

Dear Dish,
Why on earth would you want to take revenge on your boyfriend by sleeping with someone else. The best way to take revenge on your boyfriend is to pretend that nothing is the matter. Tell him you forgive him. Then one night when he’s not suspecting it, burn the word “CHEATER” on his forehead with a hot brand.

Good Luck,
Mr Knightley