Tag Archives: decision

Dog Eat Dog World

Dear Mr. Knightley,

My fiancee is a dog person. I am not. Probably because I’m slightly allergic to them and probably because I was bit by one when I was a kid. So she has this german shepherd named Tag. He’s friendly and lovable, at least thats what everyone tells me. Because you see, Tag hates me. I mean, completely hates me. I don’t know if he’s just protective of her or whatever but he barks at me constantly and growls at me and won’t let me come near him. She says he just has to get use to me, but we’ve been dating for over two years and he still acts the same way. Now I’m fine with us keeping the dog, as long as it stays outside and everything. But she won’t even hear a word of it, because she treats it like its a person. I mean, she lets him sit on the couches and sleep in her bed. Which will definitely be a problem very very soon. I think it just has to go. She says that Tag is like her baby and she can’t just give him up. And then she gets all angry at me saying that I am trying to make her choose between us. What am I supposed to do? I mean, I love her. I really do. And I am willing to work and try to make it work. But the dog is the problem and I feel like she’s not even willing to think about the consequences for me. Is there anyway of fixing this or should I just suck it up and try to get by?

– Inthe Doghouse

Aint nothing but a houndog

 

Dear Inthe,

Your situation is definitely going to require a lot of finesse on your part. You obviously love this woman and want to make her happy, even if the situation is somewhat uncomfortable for you. And she probably wants to be able to keep Tag and you at the same time. The first step, would be communicating. Its essential that you are clear that you are not trying to keep her from Tag. And that you are willing to make some sacrifices. Setting her at ease will then open up the channels for finding compromise. It does not have to be an either-or situation. There are in fact several different options.

If you allergy is not too severe, you may be able to treat it with some simple allergen medication. This takes care of at least part of the problem. You may also attempt to reach a compromise with your fiancee in that, maybe Tag can be allowed in the house, but not on the couches or beds. Or something to that extent.

As long as she knows you are making the effort to accommodate her and Tag, she will most likely also be willing to accommodate your concerns as well. Instead of viewing this as a burden or obstacle, see this as a perfect opportunity for the two of you to practice communication, problem solving, and compromise for your coming life together. With the right mind set this can become a positive bonding experience.

Cordially,

Mr. Knightley

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The Hardest Choice

Dear Mr. Knightley, 

I am divided about writing to you. Partly because I think I already know what you’re gonna say and partly because I have no idea what to do. You see, there are these two guys in my life right now. And they both mean a lot to me. And I feel a lot for them. But now Prom is coming up and I have to chose between them. And I don’t know who to chose….

Erick is really nice and funny and we get along really well (actually we work together so we see each other almost every day) and I know he likes me because he’s basically told me in every possible way except saying it out right. And I think the only reason he won’t is because he doesn’t want to ruin our friendship if I say no. 

Then there’s Ben. He’s smart, and handsome, and I’ve had a crush on him for a while now. And he’s finally started to pay attention to me. Not that he didn’t before. We were friends but we never really had a chance to spend time together just the two of us. But now we’ve started going to coffee together, just as friends, and reading books together, and it feels so good. 

I would feel like a jerk if I went to Prom with Ben, because of how long Erick has been basically in love with me. But I can’t help thinking that Ben and I fit together better and that we would have a better chance to maybe find love if we had a chance to spend more time together. I guess what I’m stuck between is what I feel I want to do and what I feel I should do. 

Any Ideas?

Divided Heart

Making a choice

Which one to chose

My Dear Divided,

I’m so very glad to have you as my first letter. Especially seeing as this letter pertains to my special talent, namely finding the right match for every single person left in Yorkshire and after that, the world. You see, love is such a wonderful thing there is no real reason for anyone to keep such a silly notion as singleness for long.

I would advise that you find out as soon as possible, whether or not this Ben has any kind of intention towards you. You may write him a letter, or you may have one of your friends ask one of his friends. But either way, ascertain an answer as soon as possible, so that you can find out if he is even worth considering. If he is, then go for him, for if Erick’s love is really as true and ardent as you have described, he shall only grow the more steadfast while you pursue Ben. And then if it doesn’t work out with Ben you know you always have Erick to fall back on.

I know this must sound terrible, but really, is it that wrong? You may find truest love with Ben and that is definitely worth the risk. And if Erick does not wait for you, then it may not have been real love after all, and then you have avoided quite a serious future entanglement. Test Erick’s love while also attempting Ben’s and you shall never find yourself wanting in admirers.

Sincerely,

Mrs. Jenings